Council Chairman Tells Residents "Vote APC Or Leave," Forgets Where He Kept His Manifesto

Somewhere in Abuja, a council chairman looked at his residents, thought about all the good governance talking points he could use, and instead landed on: vote my party or pack your bags. Bold strategy. Very democratic. Very "I studied at the school of thought that campaigning is optional once you already have the keys to the office."

Because let's be honest, this is the kind of statement that answers a question nobody asked. If the roads were good, if light was correct, if the borehole in that community was actually working, nobody would need to be threatened into loyalty. People don't usually need convincing to support something that's working for them. You don't beg somebody to enjoy jollof rice that's actually sweet.

But here we are, watching a man whose job is to serve residents instead sound like a landlord reminding tenants that the rent is due and the agreement has changed. "Vote APC or leave" is not a campaign strategy, it's a mood, the mood of somebody who has confused holding office with holding a title deed to human beings.

And the funniest part? Where exactly should these residents go? Abuja is the capital. If people cannot feel free to vote whoever they like in the capital city of the country, someone needs to explain what federal character was even for.

Meanwhile, party loyalists are already defending him online, saying it was "said in the heat of the moment", the same heat of the moment that seems to visit only politicians, always at press time, always caught on camera, always somehow needing an explanation the next morning.

By the next election cycle, everyone will have conveniently forgotten this ever happened, right up until another chairman somewhere says the exact same thing, and Nigerians will collectively act surprised all over again, like it's not a whole genre of statement by now.