Minister of Works promises to fix all roads by simply removing them from Google Maps
'If you can't see the road, you can't complain about it,' the minister explained during a 4-hour press conference held in his Range Rover.
ABUJA — The Minister of Works has unveiled an ambitious 18-month plan to address Nigeria's deteriorating road network: an aggressive programme of cartographic deletion.
Under the plan, badly damaged roads will be quietly removed from Google Maps, Apple Maps and OpenStreetMap, eliminating public knowledge of their existence and, by extension, complaints about their state.
Cost-effective and forward-looking
The minister noted that the scheme is 'budget-neutral' and could be expanded to bridges, hospitals and any other infrastructure 'we'd rather not deal with right now'.
Citizens are advised to memorize their commutes by Friday.
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