PHCN Promises 24-Hour Electricity by 2099, Nigerians Cautiously Optimistic

In what officials have described as "an ambitious but achievable milestone," the Power Holding Company of Nigeria (PHCN) has assured Nigerians that uninterrupted 24-hour electricity will finally become a reality by the year 2099, provided "everything goes according to plan, and nobody asks too many questions."

The announcement was greeted with cautious optimism, particularly by citizens who have already begun updating their wills to include instructions for future generations to "keep believing."

"This is the kind of long-term planning we have been asking for," said one Lagos resident while refuelling his generator for the third time that day. "I may not enjoy it, but my great-grandchildren deserve stable power."

According to PHCN, the roadmap will be implemented in carefully managed phases.

Phase One involves forming a committee to design a committee that will recommend another committee to monitor the progress of the first committee.

Officials estimate this stage should be completed by 2078.

The agency also unveiled a countdown clock titled "Power Is Coming," which currently displays 73 Years Remaining, adding that the timer may occasionally go off due to power outages.

Meanwhile, generator dealers welcomed the announcement, describing it as "comfortably outside our business planning horizon."

Manufacturers of rechargeable lamps, inverters, power banks, candles, and extension boxes also expressed confidence that demand would remain "healthy for several more generations."

Government officials urged Nigerians to remain patient, reminding citizens that Rome was not built in a day and that stable electricity should likewise not be expected within a century.

At press time, the nationwide broadcast announcing the breakthrough was briefly interrupted after the television station lost power halfway through the Minister's speech.