Producer Announces Film Based Entirely on Twitter Arguments

In what critics are already describing as "the most realistic Nigerian screenplay in years," an ambitious Nollywood producer has announced a new feature film written entirely from screenshots of Twitter arguments, insisting that "there's more drama there than in most scripts."

According to the producer, no professional screenwriter was hired because "Nigerians have been writing free content online for years."

The film, tentatively titled Quote Tweet, reportedly follows two strangers who spend three days arguing over a topic neither of them understands before somehow dragging tribalism, feminism, politics, football, religion, and Jollof rice into the conversation.

Casting directors have begun searching for actors capable of saying, "Nobody is talking about that," immediately before talking about exactly that.

Sources close to the production revealed that every line of dialogue was copied directly from viral Twitter threads, meaning half the characters communicate exclusively through sarcasm, reaction GIFs and the phrase, "This is why Nigeria can never move forward."

The director confirmed that the movie contains no clear beginning or ending because, like every Twitter argument, it simply continues until everyone is too exhausted to care.

Meanwhile, cinemas are preparing for audience participation, allowing viewers to pause the film every five minutes to shout, "Context!" before refusing to provide any themselves.

At press time, the project had already sparked over 250,000 online arguments from people demanding the film be cancelled, praised, boycotted and awarded Best Picture—all before a single scene had been shot or anyone had bothered to read the announcement beyond the headline.